Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, 

Friend Request, Connect Requests and Followers.  

What's the etiquette for responding (or not!)?

Hello!  My name's Louisa and I am an addict, I just can't get enough, a social media whore, I find the beep of notifications for all the platforms an irresistible draw.   I have made some great online friends and contacts and I reckon I know the systems well.  So here's a little piece about how to handle contact requests and privacy settings.

It has taken me a long time to get here, lots of rejections and unfriendings but honestly that's not how to work social media.

I used to refuse connect requests from people I didn't know, and unfriend people if we hadn't been in touch for a while, but that really only serves to create bad feeling and quite frankly, it is bad mannered.  

So, when should you refuse a friend request on Facebook? 

Never!

When should you refuse a connect request on LinkedIn? 

Never!

Why, I hear you ask!  LinkedIn tells me after all that I should only accept contact from people I actually know.  Facebook is all about protecting your privacy.

Okay here's why!  On Facebook you have a lot of control over what you share but you need to understand how grouping system works.  If someone sends you a friend request and you're not keen to be any closer, unless they're a stalker (in which case you should block them and report them) accept their request, and put them straight into a group called 'restricted'.  Restricted is automatic group which means they will only see anything you post for public viewing.  So they don't get to see your stuff, nor do they get annoyed or upset about being rejected!

LinkedIn - why would anyone ever refuse a connect request on LinkedIn - you basically have to pay LinkedIn a subscription to get your profile boosted - more contacts is more free viewings, more networking opportunities.  Keep connecting!  Just don't post sensitive personal or company information or anything that might elicit responses that enable your competitors to steal your clients or business!

An example of this would be, as I have recently seen, one of my competitors posting jobs that got responses from potential candidates.  I was then able to pick off and connect with the candidates myself!

But, if you have a contact on LinkedIn who posts inappropriate remarks on your posts, I would block them and the same for Facebook.  

It is so hard to gain followers on Twitter, because it is not an automatic like for like, people can follow you without you following them and you can follow them without them following you!  

Spread the love, connect, connect, and follow!  It's nice to be nice!  All publicity is good publicity after all!